So I figured I'd turn my complaining into the post that would go up, because I'm nowhere near done with any of the drafts I have saved.
And so is graphic design, but I think that deserves its own post someday.
I'm not promising this is going to make any sense. I'm tired and it's dreary outside and I'm trying to get this post up asap considering I started writing this post five hours after I was supposed to post something.
Blogging is a lot of writing
"But you're a writer! How is this hard for you?"
Because I can be as un-eloquent in my creative writing as I want and it still counts as part of the character's voice. I also assume most of the stuff I write isn't going to be read by anyone else.
But, you know, being understandable is kind of necessary when you're writing with the intention of having people read it. And I'm terrible at remembering to proof-read my posts before I hit publish.
And then there's also the issue of trying to keep my speaking voice and my writing voice the same. I'm about the least eloquent person in real life. Writing gives me more time to plan out my thoughts before I share them, but my brain moves faster than both my mouth and my hands and I don't always keep up.
Blogging is a lot of planning
Which I obviously am lacking in recently. I started a blogging notebook back in December, but that only does me any good when I actually look at it, which doesn't always happen.
I'm also not the best at creating contingency plans. Like right now! My Fave New Music post was initially supposed to go up today, but I didn't have a post for Friday and I moved it back to fill that gap, creating this gap in the process. And then I forgot about it.
Part of this chaos is also because I still haven't fallen back into a reading groove, so I don't have nearly as many review posts to publish. I honestly relied a lot on those to pad my schedule.
Blogging is a lot of talking into the void
I have a very tiny audience, and despite what Google Analytics and Blogger's internal stats tell me, I'm pretty sure the only people that actually look at my blog are related to me. (Hi. I love you.)
It's a little discouraging to see younger / newer bloggers than me have so much more audience and interaction, but I know that a lot of my problem is from being an introvert and struggling with interpersonal interaction. (Which actually makes the talking into the void aspect a good thing sometimes. The void doesn't answer you.)
Blogging is a lot of ups and downs
Literally and figuratively. My blog stats tend to spike a lot, which tends to be more from getting crawled by bots than having actual people check this little website out. My stats on Google Analytics are still heavily skewed towards referrals from Russian websites and / or spam pages. (I really don't understand why they're directing traffic my way, tbh.)
In the figurative sense, I was doing really well in the summer / early fall, and then I started to fall out of the habit (ha) and began struggling with having posts go up on time. I've been pushing myself to keep this "post every three days" rule, but sometimes I wonder if it's really worth it. Technically I did manage to keep the habit for an entire year. I accomplished my original goal.
All that said, I'm nowhere near ready to give up blogging. I really do like having a page entirely to myself that's just content that I make. And it's been great to hear that actual irl people have looked at my blog and enjoyed what I wrote.
I'm really hoping this creative lull that hit me post-NaNo is going to leave soon so I can start feeling productive again.
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